Lots of change is afoot in these parts.
In 2.5 weeks we bring E to college. Something I think we are all excited about. A new start for everyone. Just a few days off of swimming (with her early morning practice) has brought out a well rested, nicer E. Not having to be quiet at 8:30 at night so she can get to sleep gives us all a glimpse of a more relaxed household when she's off to school.
A and M also start high school in 3 weeks. Soccer tryouts start the week before. A doesn't really want to play because he's nervous about his academic workload and not having enough time for his herpetology and skateboarding. We want him to at least try. We have finally figured out how they are getting to school, but still not sure how I'm going to be able to manage the addition of the high school soccer schedule and the other kids sports. Like most things I keep repeating my mantra of "it always works out."
D and M are away at team soccer camp this week. It's been weird only having 3 kids in the house. It's been nice for the 3 at home to get a little more time with me. Dinners especially have been more relaxed. I think they are having a good time at camp, but D has called a lot and last night called at 10:55pm wanting us to come see him today. Since it's over an hour away AND we're picking them up tomorrow at noon, we're not going, but it's hard to hear him homesick. He's never EVER slept away from home without us (even friend sleepovers). I think he's tired, which isn't helping things, and is having fun but misses his family. M being with him helps I think (including all the attention from her 14 year old girls team). As nice as this week has been, I miss them and want all my guys home.
We got M's results from her ADHD retesting. It was really good. They were able to pinpoint her challenges a little more and actually confirm something she's always complained about. We also have two distinct diagnosis of ADHD and General Anxiety Disorder. We last tested her right after 5th grade and it was hard to distinguish between the two given the closeness to her trauma. We have a much clearer understanding of her challenges. I'm hoping we can help her more and I'm confident that the services she'll be getting at school will help her all around.
I wrote K a letter.
I know that sounds so silly, but sometimes it's easier to write things down than talk about them in person.
I think he heard me. It's broken the ice enough to allow us to have a few tough conversations in the last two days.
One thing I've learned in the last 5 years is that love is both simple and complicated. Taking in the girls out of love was simple. Getting E to love us as her family is a still evolving paradigm. I love K with all of my heart. Marriage is often tough, though, and romantic love is sometimes the farthest thing from the reality of raising a family (a complicated one at that).
Lots of changes. Some good. Some challenging (not going to label them as bad yet). There still is a lot of love though. That's not changing.