Tuesday, August 21, 2012

New Cars and Next Steps

We just bought a third family car (or at least that's what we're calling it). It is primarily for E to use for driving to school and practice.  We're also hoping it will be used for helping me with driving to practices, etc.  I'm not sure how much of that is going to happen once school starts, but she's already driven her sister to the dentist which was a big help.

I'm nervous.

I'm excited for her.

I'm worried about her reaction when we lay down the law about her use of the car.  She seems to think that she can drive it whenever she wants.  Whenever I try to explain that's not the case, she doesn't seem to be really listening to me.  She did get the message about her phone (NO WAY) in the car.

K is vacillating between annoyance about having to deal with another car and excitement in getting a good deal on a nice, safe car for her.

I'm not sure how this is all going to play out.  I guess we'll just take it one day at a time.

In other news, I finally, finally, finally talked with my therapist about trying medication.  The nudge from you guys and a nudge from a good friend gave me the push I needed.  She thinks it's a very good idea.

She gave me some names of psychiatrists she trusts.  They don't take my insurance.  My friend said she just went through her primary care, but I'm nervous about that.  Thoughts?

I told K.  He was quiet.  Then he cracked a joke.  We haven't talked about it since.  He seemed okay with it.  I'm not sure how he'll take the expense if I decide to go out of network.

Even without the actual drugs adjusting my brain chemistry, I feel better after making the decision.  I feel hopeful.  I want to be a better mom.  They deserve it and I have to believe that this step will help me get there.  Right?


  1. When I was in grad school and had depression, medication took the edge off so that I could function better. Talk therapy helped me figure out why I was depressed and develop coping skills. For other people I've known on medication, they've described the same thing - that it helps take the edge off.

    I hope the same thing happens for you.

    I think you could see your primary care for medication, especially if your therapist has any ideas about which type of medication might work best for you. I know she can't write a prescription, but if you were her friend what would she advise as a friennd.

  2. A very dear friend of mine struggled with severed depression for years as they worked to get her meds adjusted. Once they did she was a whole new person. Truly. They helped her so much, lifted her and made her feel (as she put it) "human again". Both my mother and father, and Brien have all used antidepressants and I couldn't speak more highly of them. They took the edge off and helped them function.

    I think you making the decision has eased your mind, and that's a huge plus. B and my parents all had their prescriptions through their PCPs, if that helps. You have a therapist you know and trust, so I think the primary doctor route should be fine.

    As for the car, I think it's going to help so much you'll be amazed. I foresee a bit of trouble with E and the rules of when she can use it but once that's well-established, it should be smooth sailing.

    You've made some BIG decisions this week!

  3. Sounds like progress! Having an extra driver in the house to help with that crazy schedule I think will be great. And trying out an anti-depressant seems like it could make you feel more in control. I'm hopeful for you!

  4. Here's my professional opinion - I've been a therapist. I was in NO way qualified to even suggest what medication you should take. Also, I always recommend going to see a psychiatrist for psychiatric medications. It's a speciality. If you broke your leg, you'd see an ortho MD. If you were diagnosed with diabetes, you'd see an endocronologist. Same for this, if at all possible. Call your insurance and see who they do cover. Talk to your therapist and what she knows about them. Then go from there.

    The though of teenagers driving, nearly gives ME an anxiety attack!

  5. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  6. I know its late... But I felt I should share my opinion on this. Combined with a therapist, I've always gotten meds from my primary. I saw a psychiatrist once, and she piled the meds on, first visit. Idk. Was more comfortable with the therapist.

    As for the whole taking meds in general. I know you've already started them at this point but PLEASE. Don't beat yourself up over it. We all need a little help sometimes. And a depressed/anxious mommy is not good for anyone. You can't make the best of situations for your family, if your not the best *you* and meds are almost always temporary.